Thursday, May 22, 2008

yankee pitching woes, chapter 2,506

arod is back. thanks for consistently having contact with the ball. ....uh, yeah....

darrell "if-it-weren't-for-those-5-hits-i-could-have-pitched-a-perfect-game," rasner.

7.0 innings pitched last night, 5 hits, 0 runs. that's not not good.

but, you know. hell. it's just one game. why get all fussy over rasner? i mean...we have other places and people to fixate upon, ya know?

one night, last season, when the yankees were all up-in-arms over lack of pitching, rasner came in and pitched a gem of a game...

yet: no reporters sought to speak with him. why, you ask? i shall tell you. because THAT was the night the yankees opted to inform the media that roger clemens would be rejoining the team.

last night was another lets-show-up-rasner's-contribution night, and the yankees chose, last night, to inform the media that our boy Joba will become a starter.

shocking. no one saw this coming. yeah. wow.

rasner has started a total of 3 games this season, and has pitched a total of 19 innings this season. rasner has allowed 4 runs for 3 starts. he's all that and a bag of chips. thanks, darrell, if you haven't heard it enough: you matter.

ahhkay. and now we're back to our boys Joba (far left; the lion) and IAN-I-PITCH-LIKE-SHIT-KENNEDY (dorothy.)

(wow. is that a real dog in that basket?)

(wish he would have bit ian's pitching hand.)

yes. our boy kennedy will once again take the mound tonight and dish up another win to the team we oppose.

my forecast for tonight's game: mister kennedy will go no longer than 4 innings and allow no fewer than 10 runs. heheh.

sorry...lately it seems like we've stretched our bad pitching into double digit runs allowed, i figure i'd stay in that vein.

okay. and so that takes us into the next point of discussion. with joba starting, who will the set-up man be? okayfirst off, i don't like the set-up-man thing. i don't. i say the 8th inning should be a match up thing. i really do. and not on the torre level of "no-fewer-than-5-relief-pitchers-used." i would prefer using a starter for 7...matching it up in the 8th, however that applies, and then bringing in a closer.

but the yankees wish for a set-up-man. the 1-2 punch. we've sought that for years. and it, ineffectively, has never arrived.

options. we have (brace yourself:) kyle farnsworth (who, up until the last game wasn't so bad then revealed to us the reason why we despise him) and edwar ramirez.

dude. i say if you have to choose 1...go with edwar. please. (did you know edwar has pitched in 9 games this year and still has not allowed 1 run? true. edwar has a 0.00 ERA. albeit, he has pitched 10 innings total and last year in 21 innings he allowed 19 runs...i still think he is a safer bet than kyle.)

(this year, alone, farnsworth has pitched 20 innings and allowed 9 runs. not so long ago he logged in 46 innings and gave away 47 runs. i dunno. 102mph fastballs. hard to control, i guess. i say bring him in when desperate. or when edwar needs rest. or when we need to retaliate and we want it remembered.)

(who said that? lord. we all know farnsworth can't be held responsible for off pitches. they go where they go, right? right....)

yankee pitching woes. chapter 2,506. and here we are again. some good news is we have our boys mark melancon and danny mccutchen warmin up in AAA. things could improve. and they better...cause i'm fairly certain we won't have moose nor pettitte next year. so, we better get to figuring this shit out. it's frustrating playing spin-the-wheel with these veterans and rookies, but we all know how outings can go bad. ask wang, moose, and pettitte.

shit, ask kennedy. no, don't ask him. he'll pontificate how, "aside from that one pitch which was hit for a grand slam, i had my stuff---"

(and all the while, when interviewed, he behaves like someone shoved a spoonful of peanut butter in his mouth. literally. he's constantly smackin his lips and licking his teeth. it's icky. i say: don't diet, just watch an ian kennedy interview before snacking. you'll lose your appetite, promise.)