Friday, April 27, 2012

MVP...as of 4/27/12

As I was walking to my car this morning, a thought occured to me. A question, actually. And that question (which just randomly entered my mind) was; "Who, in your opinion, is the most valuable player in Major League Baseball today?"

As I took a few more steps, I wondered why I would ask this question to myself.

Perhaps having seen the last few minutes of Moneyball right when I woke up...perhaps pondering Billy Beane and sabermetrics and being passionate about baseball...and it being 6 o'clock in the morning had influenced me internally. I figured I'd go with it. I figured I'd check later and see how close I was to being right. Therefore, my answer to myself was straight and simple, "Derek Jeter."

And here we are. nearly 6 hours later and I have finally taken a moment or two to reflect upon this morning's muse. Having dealt with more pressing work-related matters, I opted to take a moment or two to crunch some stats and see if, indeed, I was right.

I was.

Now, inasmuch as we've got Matt Kemp leading the league with his batting average at .449, and David Ortiz in second place (with stats of which I refuse to waste time considering), I discovered Jeter in third for the league with a .420 average. This all being the case, one might wonder how I can emphatically conclude Derek Jeter to be the most valuable player in the league today...

Allow me to retort. First off, Ortiz (and whatever he has accomplished) is a DH. This means he contributes ZERO to defense, he rests between at-bats, and basically would be considered an asset at-bat. However, if pitched around, his only value becomes a non-consideration and therefore amounts to not much. Judging by the last few consecutive months of Red Sox baseball, I'd say his contribution is moot at best.

Now we skip ahead to the two main contributors of defense, as well as hitting. Inasmuch as Kemp is batting .449 with 31 hits in 19 games, 4 2B, 10HR, 23 RBI, 10BB, and 1 stolen base...Jeter, in 18 games has MORE HITS (34), MORE DOUBLES (6), and has as many stolen bases as Kemp.

What about RBI and HOMERS, you ask? Well, yes. Jeter does have LESS RBI than Kemp, (13), that is 10 less RBI. However, Kemp, for all of 2012 thus far, has bat THIRD in each game with his evil Dodgers. Jeter, conversely, never bats third, and is generally in a lead-off batting order which means there generally aren't men on base to bat in. For Jeter to be a mere 10 RBI behind Kemp is quite impressive, given that disadvantage.

Let's also talk about the value of each players defense. Inasmuch as I love a good outfielder, I would say a MULTI GOLD GLOVE WINNING SHORTSTOP is far more crucial with regard to executing a double play or a laid-down bunt...simply put: there aren't too many good defenders at Short, who can also BAT. Nothing against outfielders, but, it's not unusual for "those who can hit," to be placed way out in the field cause perhaps "they can't field." (jus sayin.) It is a known fact that most Shortstops don't hit for power. Again, in my opinion, to have a player at Short who is a career .314 batter, that's quite impressive.

That is, Matt Kemp, 27 years old, on his 7th season in the majors, with a career .297 batting average, is indeed NOT AS VALUABLE AS Derek Jeter, 38 years old, on his 18th season of major league baseball, with a career .314 batting average, who is presently batting .420 for 2012 and engaged in a 15-game hitting streak. Sue me if you disagree...but these are my reasons, my facts, and my musings. And I'm right.

"How can you not be passionate about baseball...?" ~Billy Beane

Sunday, February 26, 2012



Something about waiting all winter for baseball to resume seems to add to the expectation that the waiting will have amounted to something other than what I seemed to be encountering...


By May 7th, I was fairly certain I had arrived at a conclusion:



It is better to wait without baseball, than to have baseball and continue to



lose games.



Something about one day turning into another day, turning into a week, turning into a month, didn't seem as evil and depressing and annoying and perplexing, as when one has nothing but days and weeks and months without baseball. However, days and weeks and months of continual loss is just pure unadulterated shite and one must ask themselves, "Why am I allowing myself to be a victim of this stupid game when I could spend a nice day in the park on the swings, kicking over sand castles and throwing sticks at nearby joggers?"

On May 7th, I was already aware of the Pythagorean projection for the 2009 New York Yankees; Slated to win 95 games, slated to lose the Division despite having acquired Teixeira, Burnett, and Sabathia. Slated for, at most 3rd place, within the American League East, behind the evil Boston Red Sox and equally annoying Tampon Bay Rays.

By May 7th, after having lost 5 games (out of 5 games) to the evil Red Sox...and after having lost a myriad of other games to the evil Tampon Bay Rays, Toronto, Baltimore...ah hell, you name the team, we were losing to them...rolling over and handing them wins.



In fact, by May 7th, we had a total of 13 wins. Uh huh. 13 whole wins...and 15 big fat losses...



AND...we had just accomplished another rare milestone for most baseball teams*: we had just completed yet another losing streak: this time of 5 straight games...(and, as irony would dictate with all the "5's," involved)...yes...we were 5.5 games back for the division.



(* except for the Marlins, Nationals, Orioles, Mets, and all them other sucky teams.)




The season had just begun. And we couldn't hit, we couldn't field, we couldn't pitch, we couldn't run...but DAMN! did we did have that whole WALKING THE BASES LOADED and STRIKING OUT WITH MEN ON BASE thing down pat.

I remember that morning of May 7th...



I sat down...and there on the tv...an interview with Jeter...the Captain...



after yet another Yankees / Red Sox loss.



And there he is...answering the usual non-applicable questions encountered by interviewers after losses...asked by some nameless / faceless person who generally has no concept as to what the game of baseball involves...but relishes the idea that they are talking with the LOSER who MAY OR MAY NOT just break into tears and beg for a hug...



as if we're the Mets or something...



but the question...

I'll never forget it. A clearly fatigued (and seemingly annoyed NON-CRYING) Jeter, was enduring question after question about Boston's dominance and what the hell is wrong with the Yankees and so on and so forth, was asked: "Do you have any concerns for this 2009 Yankees Team?"





(Which I thought was a repetitious question and just filler for detaining Jeter just a little bit longer for possible post-interview huggage...)

And then he turned his head, looked straight into the camera and uttered a single word: "Nope."



His lips pursed, his gaze still straight at the camera...a cold silence filled the room...and those eternal 5 seconds of Jeter looking straight into the camera...at the viewer...at ME, basically...that determination...that confidence...

I walked out onto the balcony and thought to myself: he's delusional.

And then the questions rolled into my head: "How can he be so emphatic? Why did he say he has no concerns? Did he just want to end the stupid interview? No concerns? Is it the money? Does he have no concerns cause he just doesn't care?"

But then the answers rolled in. "He cares. He's a professional. He knows how to play the game. They all know how to play the game. Something is missing that I haven't seen yet, but he knows this 2009 Yankees team has what it takes and will do what they need to do. He knows something. And, if HE has no concerns, and he REALLY CLEARLY DOES NOT, then I will have no concerns, either. I will wait. I will wait and see if I can discover what he knows about this team.... I will wait, and I will see..."

By May 23rd, 2009, the Yankees were able to amass a 9 game winning streak and come within 1 game of the Division.



Ah, yes...throughout the 2009 season, the Yankees had a losing record to teams like the evil PHILLIES...and almost got swept by both the CLUELESS FLORIDA MARLINS and the equally inept WASHINGTON NATIONALS...



They lost 9 to the evil Red Sox...and the world of Yankee fans were beginning to believe the end of the world was at hand...sackcloth and ashes were going up in stock on Wall Street...





but then the 2009 Yankees TOOK the evil Red Sox for 9.



And...in the end, that whole projection of 95 wins was somewhat misconfigured, as the New York Yankees finished the regular season with 103 wins...went on to the World Series, and went on to become World Champions.

Again.

And, after the end of the 2009 season, I came to a "Derek Jeter Emphatic Delusional," conclusion: "Tis better to have played and lost...Than to have never played at all."

Monday, December 26, 2011

prospects, HUH. what are they good for???


(the following is a reply to an email i just wrote regarding trading kids in our farm system to bulk up our team. forgive the possible inaccuracies, although i got most of it right...i just woke up...and i typed it all in about 4 minutes.)

the thing is, yes. rookies, or prospects, do have seasons of struggle. i remember when everyone was all in fits over cano's first few seasons, wanting to trade him due to his fielding and, well, lack of TENURE / SUPERSTAR status, really. and here we are. cashman stood by him, knowing he was still developing, and the ALL SO SOUGHT AFTER VETERAN FREE AGENTS would only continue to age and their career numbers would decline and we'd be right back at square one, looking for YET ANOTHER VETERAN FREE AGENT to fill his shoes. yes, not all prospects develop into KEEPERS. but, robbie went on to post some amazing numbers and acquire a silver? glove (if not gold. again, it's the offseason and i'm barely awake right now...)

what the san francisco giants wouldn't do for a robbie cano today...

and, inasmuch as i am FINE with freeing ourselves from ian kennedy, turns out he really DID have the potential cashman had stood by in 08. (although he and hughes hadn't quite developed enough to be in the 4th and 5th spots.) however, they...along with cano and a handful of others, were sought in exchange for JOHAN SANTANA. well, where is santana now? and how many seasons has he MVP'd for the mets? imagine, instead of a future of developing prospects (much like jeter, rivera, pettitte, posada, etc. etc. who forged a dynasty and have remained as invaluable to the yankees) we would be looking to replace johan.

i am a firm proponent of holding onto valuable prospects. 2010, the san francisco giants utilized madison bumgarner in the world series. the kid was in AA when the season began. and where was their $127 million dollar VETERAN, barry zito? not even on the roster.

the future is NOT formulating a team of HAS-BEEN VETS with lengthy contracts that usher us into a 92 wins season, behind the red sox...

the future is patiently grooming our prospects and wise trades or FA acquisitions. after all, was ANYONE thinking MVP for a guy named DAVID FREES last december? if you were, i applaud you. lol.

anyhow. this is the foundation of my philosophy behind building another dynasty. not unlike the vision buck showalter has had for the various championship-bound teams he's been asked to assemble over the years.

as a side note, it was BUCK who preceeded OUR dynasty. when jeter, pettitte, posada, and rivera were rookies. and rivera was extremely close to being traded, due to his COMPLETE INABILITY TO START. patience and vision. and here we are. we will always have the BEST CLOSER IN THE HISTORY OF THE GAME.

just food for thought...

Wednesday, September 28, 2011



oh my GOODNESS! where to START?


well, i just wanna give a shout out to REIMOLD (spelling insignificant, really) and to the other dude (ANDINO?) for SMACKIN THE SNOT out of the ball on JONATHON PAPELBON'S WATCH.



i wanna thank the RED SOX for manufacturing one of the FUNNEST septembers i've had in a long time...

i wanna thank the TAMPON BAY RAYS for being pesky lil shites and makin boston SWEAT...


i wanna give a shout out to all 90 of the batters across the League (both American annnnd National) who were routinely HIT BY BOSTON PITCHERS UPON VARIOUS PARTS OF THEIR PERSONS...


god...who am i forgetting?? oh, i wanna give a shout out to LESTER for pitching on 3 days rest and looking JUST AS BAD TODAY as he has for a while now...





i wanna give a shout out to the 2010 RED SOX TEAM who, while missing ALL THE PRIMADONNA OVERPAID PHENOMS WHO WERE HERALDED AS THE NEXT WORLD SERIES MESSIAHS FOR 2011, went out there and played some BADASS BALL as minor leaguers called up and whatnot, GUESS WHAT BOYS? YALL scored only 1 less win last year than when ALL THE PRIMADONNAS RETURNED FROM THEIR VARIOUS REAL OR IMAGINARY INJURIES and after THEO SOLD THE FARM TO GET CARL "don't axe me to do shit for this team," CRAWFORD & "YO," ADRIAN GONZALEZ!



(and them kids only had to hit 53 batters, nearly half as many as the 2011 INPENETRABLE STARTING ROTATION OF AWE AND WONDER we all beheld and read about and were made to HEAR about on a daily basis from december til, well, TIL NOW.


GOD BLESS THE BALTIMORE ORIOLES FOR BEING GUTSY, GRITTY, AND SHOWING THE WORLD: "WE GOT FOR $85 MILLION WHAT YOU AIN'T GOT FOR $160 MILLION!" *

*(mind you, YO ADRIANS SALARY AND BONUS AREN'T REFLECTED IN THAT SUM, AND RUMOR HAS IT: IN THE END, THE BOSTON RED SOX WILL MORE THAN LIKELY HAVE OUT-SPENT THE YANKEES IN 2011. jus sayin.)


wow. before closing, i wanna thank JESUS and the Academy and the makers of Red Bull and MLB EXTRA INNINGS. hat's off to the red sox for their historic moment, witnessed by MOST of us...never before accomplished in baseball: the GREATEST COLLAPSE IN ALL MAJOR LEAGUE HISTORY. i knew ya'll had it in you. thanks for making our dreams a reality. good night and God bless!

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Intergalactic Domination and Clam Chowder...


In 2009, the New York Yankees had a regular season record against the Los Angeles Angels at Anaheim of 5 wins and 5 losses.

...The Yankees also had a regular season record against the Boston Red Sox of 9 wins, 9 losses.

When I consider this season of 2011, many questions arise as I look ahead and look behind.

With 33 games remaining, and presently sitting atop the American League East, I realize: unless the Yankees have some epic collapse, they will more than likely make the post-season...as will the Red Sox...as well as the Texas Rangers and the Detroit Tigers.

The irony of looking ahead is the inability to predict anything. Take, for example, the regular season records mentioned above. Fact is, the Yankees never had to face the Red Sox in the post-season that year, due to the fact that the evil Anaheim faction obliterated the skanky Red Sox from any further post-season activity and sent them evil bitchez home to cry in their imitation clam chowder...


(Note to self: did you ever send Anaheim flowers?)

And yet...all of 2009...What did the Yankees and their fans hear all season long? How inept and lifeless the Yankees were, especially against teams playing .500 or above...and how the Yankees were about to really get the living snot beat out of them if they made the playoffs...and had to face real teams...


(I can still hear Joe Buck's voice in my head. And McCarver.)

(I should sue them for emotional damages. I'd like a Maserati. And a mansion to park it in...)


...In the end, what was all the fuss about? Nothin'.

You see, in October, the baseball world becomes entwined in possibilities and impossibilities.

Sure, stats show "aptitude," and "propensity."

We see trends and mind-blowing effort from individual players all across the League...but in October, all that Major League White Noise gets distilled down to one concentrated grenade-like team emitting one continual sonorous hummmm...predestined toward one unquenchable goal...

...a single entity, willing and present, seeking complete annihilation and victory over all who would oppose it, or stand in it's unquenchable path...it's destiny: to obliterate the world as we know it and take over the entire galaxy by their superior dominance, victorious badassness, and opulent excellence.

This is, after all, why it's called, the "World Series."

(Uh huh. It's a good thing the Yankees have been taking over the galaxy as much as we have. Could you imagine the state of the universe if the Red Sox had continual galaxy domination and influence? Black holes would shoot things back out at us and the Earth would tilt right off it's axis in a very understandible rejection of such an overt violation of Natural Selection...)

This is another example of empirical evidence proving one endless truth: God is a Yankee fan.

In a best of 5 series where someone like Kenny Rogers (DET, 2006 ALDS) can become Cy Young...and bugs can cause a rookie pitcher to collapse on the mound while slathered in DEET faster than a Crisco-slathered house of cards...where do all the regular season stats and possibilites fit?

(For: the Yankees went on to beat the evil ANAHEIM FACTION and advanced to the WORLD SERIES against the evil PHILADELPHIA PHILLIES...where they actually BEAT THEM, TOO. Incidentally, the New York Yankees had a .333 1 win/ 2 losses record against the Phillies that season. And spared the planet from a Phillies domination. Again.)

In 2011, the Yankees have a losing record against just 2 teams: the Red Sox and the Detroit Tigers. Is this a cause for concern?

Again, when a team like the SAN FRANCISCO GIANTS can have a regular season record against the SAN DIEGO PADRES of 12 losses in 18 games...and the Padres opt to go on some 10-game losing streak just 2 weeks before the end of the season, does it matter if you never hear from them again?

Yet those very Giants find a way to skate past the ATLANTA BRAVES (with whom they had a 3 wins/ 4 losses regular season record), and even over-power the PHILADELPHIA PHILLIES (3/3) and take on one of the hottest hitting teams in the entire league (the Texas Rangers, sporting one CLIFF LEE) and STILL found a way to WIN IT ALL...after entering the post-season with merely 92 wins....hell: Anything is possible, indeed.

Ask Bill Buckner.

October is different.

Or is it??

Perhaps for SOME teams, the regular season wins are all that matter. Take, for instance, the 2011 Red Sox team. They presently have a losing record against 7 teams: CHICAGO WHITE SOX, CLEVELAND INDIANS, PHILADELPHIA PHILLIES, PITTSBURGH PIRATES, SAN DIEGO PADRES, TAMPA BAY RAYS, and the TEXAS RANGERS.

However, they DO have 10 wins against the Yankees. (And, oddly, even WITH 10 direct losses, the Yankees remain neck in neck for 1st place in the AL EAST. Why is this?)

...And, more importantly, as some may assume: What IF the Red Sox and Yankees actually have to face one another in the ALCS...? Is it a SURE WIN? I'd like to submit some interesting facts regarding the Red Sox batters. It's consistent with my theory that PRETTY MUCH ALL M*THERF*GGIN TEAMS GEAR UP AND PLAY US LIKE WE'RE HOLDING THEIR FAMILY HOSTAGE AND ONLY A WIN WILL RETURN GRAMMA SAFELY TO HER ROCKING CHAIR...

Below, you can see in GREEN the batting averages of Red Sox players against the Yankees this season. Just below each BA, OBP, and SLG in GREEN you can see each players actual career numbers, for instance: Jacoby Ellsbury normally bats .275. and yet, against the Yankees, he has batted .348...



Interestingly, all but Gonzalez, Crawford, and Youkilis are batting well above their typical career numbers. Remember: career numbers span beyond just one season. Are the Red Sox overplaying the entire American League? Clearly no. These numbers simply represent their batting averages against the Yankees, so far this season.

Now, let's look at how the Yankees have batted against the Red Sox this season, in comparison to their career numbers:



Clearly, Eric Chavez, Russell Martin, and Eduardo Nunez are playing exceptionally well, even against the evil Red Sox, compared to their career averages.

After crunching many stats, and perusing trends and looking for that needle in the haystack to give me just a glimpse as to what I can expect this October, I am keenly aware of one final answer:

I have no clue.

But, one thing I do know is this: Inasmuch as the regular season is one fraught with excitement, endurance, injury, and defeat...it is possible to bring one's A-GAME to a particular team each time you oppose that team throughout the regular season. (Especially when you're getting beat to a pulp by teams like the CHICAGO WHITE SOX and the SAN DIEGO PADRES, CLEVELAND, PITTSBURGH, TAMPA BAY, AND TEXAS, right Boston?)

I firmly believe IF the Yankees discover themselves in the ALCS opposing the Red Sox, the laws of October baseball and superhero playing will have long since passed for the Red Sox. After all, they will have to eliminate either Detroit or Texas before they ever even see us. Therefore, there is NOTHING to say we will even have to ever see them again. But, if we do, I firmly believe we will all play according to our actual career numbers...and...this is extremely unfavorable for them lyin' cheatin' evil clam chowder eaters.

Friday, August 05, 2011

The Yankees at Fenway: Hit Us at Your Own Risk, Boston



...And so it begins. Again. The New York Yankees will saunter on over to Fenway this weekend, beginning tonight, to face the evil Red Sox. No doubt the beer is flowing, "sick day," calls have been received GLOBALLY, and all things CLAM CHOWDER are giddy as shit.

Let them be giddy.

The Red Sox and Yankees are presently tied for the American League East Division within Major League Baseball. And water is still wet.

Aside from that whole EPISODE against the INEPT AND DEFENSELESS (and OFFENSIVELESS, i might add) BALTIMORE ORIOLES...the Red Sox have been exceedingly prolific and effective in winning games via the HIT THE SHIT OUT OF A HANDFUL OF PLAYERS WITH PITCHES strategy.

Theo is slumming, Tito has no balls, and not one person on the planet has raised an eyebrow over this fact. To date, the Red Sox have managed to hit 60 players with pitches, and something tells me that number will rise by at least a half-dozen by night's end Sunday.

Motives. Let's begin there. Hell, I'm just gonna be honest. THEY HAD NO REASON TO SMACK THE HAPLESS ORIOLES AROUND...and yet: they did. And, funner than fun: THE ORIOLES SMACKED BACK. Get this now: the team with the LEAST amount of batter's being hit by pitchers, the Orioles were systematically assaulted by the team with the MOST amount of batters being hit by pitchers.

So, perhaps that whole ORIOLES thing was just an act of fun for Boston. However, if one pays close attention, one will see fun trends. Like Red Sox pitchers targeting a Right Fielder, eliminating him from the series, and then clocking everything to Right Field.

Jon Lester will begin the series versus Bartolo Colon tonight. Lackey faces CC Saturday, and Satan Himself (oh, yeah, I mean BECKETT) will face (of all pitchers) Freddy Garcia.

So let's make it simple. For the most part, obviously, each team is equal in offense and defense. Each team has weaknesses: i.e. Starting Pitching, and each team wants the Division title.

In 2009, the Red Sox smacked the Yankees around for 9 before the Yankees woke up, SMOKED THEIR SORRY ASSES FOR THE REMAINING 9, AND THEN WALTZED INTO THE WORLD SERIES AND WON... Therefore, these LOSSES to Boston thus far in 2011 mean NOTHING to the overall true purist Red Sox/Yankee enthusiast. Anything CAN and WILL happen. The past means NADA, and do not fool yourself in believing this isn't DOWNRIGHT WAR.

'tis.

Lester v. Colon. Advantage: Lester.
Lackey v. CC. Advantage: CC.
Beckett v. Garcia. Advantage: Satan's minion, Beckett.

Thus, clearly the Red Sox COULD sit on their heels and gladly accept 2 possible wins. However, I firmly and wholeheartedly do NOT believe that is what they will seek. HELL NO. AT FENWAY??? THEY MUST SWEEP. I mean, hell. They went 0-6 to start off the season AT FENWAY and made most of their following want to mame and torture them. And most recently, they just got SMACKED AROUND by CLEVELAND. AT FENWAY. The tide must turn.

Now, let's configure HOW.

Being that their chief WEAPON is the HIT BY PITCH to win games, systematically targeting the greatest asset to a series, I have several thoughts regarding their possible approach.

FRIDAY. LESTER. Consider it a WIN. But SATURDAY, LACKEY, this will be a loss. How to set the dominoes in order to avoid said loss....hmmmm. How bout this. Since Lester is such the KING OF THE HBP, and Saturday's game is versus SABATHIA, wouldn't it make perfect sense to lay down a BOATLOAD OF BUNTS to Sabathia and disrupt the game (like Torre and the 2009 Dodgers attempted to do against Pettitte at Los Angeles) in order to win? (insert: GOD BLESS JONATHON BROXTON *HERE*)

Thus. The laying down of bunts. Fielded by 1st and 3rd basemen, right...cause we all KNOW that CC AINT GONNA BE FIELDING THAT SHIT; I say the Red Sox will target Teixeira and "Whoever's gonna be playing 3rd," thereby eliminating those players from the rest of the series, or at least the LACKEY game, where said BUNTS will be aplenty.

And, of course, Lackey will target key players for further DL stints to pave the way for BECKETT to go out and HIT NOT ONE PERSON, BUT SHINE LIKE THE NOON DAY SUN.

(After all. This IS to be a National Broadcast, and we musn't allow the world in on our little SECRET OF SUCCESS, the HBP.)

Equally concerning for the Red Sox: both Varitek and Saltimaccia's INABILITY to catch base stealers. The New York Yankees are presently 3rd in the ENTIRE LEAGUE for stolen bases. Bottom line there: doesn't matter WHO Boston has catching. I believe, however, Varitek will catch tonight and Sunday. AFTER ALL, THIS IS TO BE A NATIONAL BROADCAST AND VARITEK IS DAH CAPTAIN. uh huh.

So. Who's got a target on their back, leg, head, elbow, etc. etc. this weekend? Welp, the safest answer is the usual suspects: Jeter, Cano, Granderson, Martin; as these tend to be their FAVORITE'S FOR INJURY PROMOTION (or POSSIBLE ON-FIELD FIGHTS WHICH MIGHT LEAD TO EJECTIONS AND SUSPENSIONS AND FINES.)

(For the Yankees, that is. As Boston has YET to have ANY ACCOUNTABILITY paid on their incessant on-field actions. But this isn't all that shocking...being that ex-Yankee manager and current Bud Selig lackey JOE TORRE is head over On Field Behavior.)

I say Lester will go after Russell Martin, Mark Teixeira, and someone else who he just feels like hitting. Eliminate Martin and Teixeira from Saturday's BUNT GAME and maybe get someone else on the DL for a bit. Pave the way for Lackey to possibly do well and get the win.

However. Russell Martin doesn't hit particulary well against Lackey ANYHOW. Plus, Lackey's never faced Franky Cervelli nor Eduardo Nunez. Thus, I say: Friday night, Girardi MUST have Martin catch and Eric Chavez play 3rd. If EITHER get hurt, NEITHER will be needed Saturday. Plus, Lester's never faced Eric Chavez. That will piss him the HELL off, and Chavey is hot as of recent. Put Chavey on 3rd. Mark will hold his own and let the chips fall.

Saturday, enter Francisco Cervelli and Eduardo Nunez. If Nunez is put into Friday night's game: I have NO DOUBT that both HE AND BRETT GARDNER will BOTH be plunked hard...as Boston will have NO REMEDY against their amazing success at working walks and stealing bases.

SIT NUNEZ FRIDAY.

Andruw Jones is more successful against Lackey (.333 BA) and should be in Right Field on Saturday.

SIT SWISH ON SATURDAY.

The key to beating Beckett is disrupting him and working his pitch count by the 3rd inning. I say all base-stealers, hot hitters, and walk-workers MUST face him and play so WICKED SMALL BALL against him. In that event, I'd like to see Nunez and Gardy back to back...and have some concern over Russell Martin's involvement in Sunday's game v. Beckett due to his .000 batting average against him. Cervelli is .286 against Beckett...

There are many question marks as to how each team will approach this series. I do not believe the Red Sox will simply come out of their slimy little pits in the earth and show up and play ball. From their continual actions this year of utilizing the HIT BY PITCH to achieve an advantage over an opponent, I believe the Yankees must prepare themselves for this approach.

And hell. If one is adept to FIGHTING FIRE WITH FIRE, and we WERE to go TOE-TO-TOE in retaliation, I say HIT PEDROIA AND GONSALEZ. Without THEM, the Red Sox are null and void.

Not that I wouldn't prefer a line-drive to the leg of ANY of the aforementioned Red Sox Starters.

Or Papelbon.

Both legs with HIM, though...

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Introducing another possibility entirely for tomorrow's game against the evil Texas faction at Yankee Stadium, in the form of a pitcher.

Brian Gordon may very well be replacing Bartolo Colon tomorrow. Uh huh. Sure, we've speculated; Noesi? Phelps? D.J. Mitchell? Our boy Manny Banuelos?


But, the Brass have announced this most recent signing of Gordon from the Philadelphia Phillies minor league affilliate, the Lehigh Valley Iron Pigs.


Uh huh. the Lehigh Valley Iron Pigs. Associated with the evil and smarmy Philadelphia Phillies. Kinda makes you wonder how close the Phillies ever were to being known as the Philadelphia Philly Valley Pigs. But, that's neither here nor there. Some labels need not be in writing...


The haters will basically describe this transaction as one where the Yankees broke into Gordon's little home and terrorized him and made him sign a contract. Uh huh. Like a Pitching Acquisition Home Invasion. Uh huh.


Well, I've read where Pitching Acquisition Home Invasions happen all the time. But generally they occur in the Japan Industrial League...And I do believe those Pitching Acquisition Home Invasions usually involve wontons. Uh huh. Wontons...and nunchucks. Now, I haven't read anything about this most recent signing of Gordon with the Yankees having anything to do with neither wontons nor nunchucks, so shut the shit up all you Philadelphia Valley Pig Yankee haters out there, got me?


The New York Yankees ain't the Japanese Industrial League.


The haters will tell you how Gordon was kidnapped against his will from his beloved evil Iron Pig team within the benevolent and hermetically sealed womb of the Phillies minor league detention center for the perpetually inept; and forced him to actually agree to receive money for his services...and possibly an ongoing opportunity to pitch in the Majors for the most successful team in the history of the game of baseball...


God, how cruel and unusual. Get Amnesty International on the phone...


or would it be better to call the S.P.C.A.??


As a converted outfielder, Gordon pitched in 2007 and 2008 posting some kickass stats: 168 Games, 366.2 Innings, with a 3.09 ERA, with a 1.156 WHIP, 2.1 BB/9, and a 7.7 K/9. In 2008, however, Gordon was forced to align himself with the evil Texas faction.


(Ironic, isn't it?? We're facing Texas with the very "sloppy seconds," with whom they had zero interest in developing)


...hell no...not when they can chase down Cliff "Primadonna Elitist Bitch" Lee...


(whom they no longer have as he went to the evil Phillies after we pretty much laid our Texas Hold Em cards down with Lee stating we didn't want him)


(and poor evil Texas couldn't afford to keep him, or so they say, so the bitch ran off to the Phillies)


(and then skip ahead a few months and here we are to today: taking this guy Gordon from the Phillies and cartin' him back to face the evil Texas faction.)


yep: it all began with Texas. That's irony. Texas irony. The kind with tabakka and spurs.)


So far in 2011, Gordon with the Iron Pigs has had outrageously good numbers, 5-0 with a 1.14 ERA in 12 games, nine of them starts. He had 56 strikeouts and just seven walks.


Noesi, conversely, has 1-1 with a 3.92 ERA in four starts for Scranton/Wilkes-Barre and is 1-0 with a 1.76 ERA in four long-relief appearances. And Phelps is 4-4 with a 2.95 ERA in 12 starts in the minors.


Now, inasmuch as I would love to see my boy Noesi take the mound on Thursday, I still see this Gordon signing as a good move on the part of the Yankees. It enables the organization to continue developing our prospects, as well as maintaining a zero-risk relationship with Gordon, as he is utter and complete DFA material if he does poorly. Thus, in essence, we're buying time and protecting our prospects and their futures...


Yes, it may appear as though the Brass have opted to overlook the prospects and went 'a-shopping,' for someone 'better;' however, in reality, if our kids got injured or shelled, their futures could be severely impacted.


(Can anyone say Chase Wright?)


Gordon basically has no future, presently, with the Phillies, et.al. as a career minor leaguer...and now has an opportunity to step up and show the world what he's got.


And let me tell you, ain't nothin sweeter, I theorize, than to be just hangin out with your fellow Iron Pigmen on some idle Tuesday and to receive a call saying, "You may be pitching at Yankee Stadium on Thursday, get mentally prepared."


I theorize he got on a plane. Puts a whole new spin on the phrase, "When pigs fly."

Wednesday, June 08, 2011

The Boston Red Sox: Hit Me with Your Best Shot?

The Red Sox and their Nation must be so very proud of the accomplishments of their "Ace," Jon Lester, especially given his most recent outing against the New York Yankees at Yankee Stadium, June 7, 2011.

Lester presently holds 8 wins to his season outings. Kudos. Sure am glad I spent time on my knees in prayer when his health was failing, and his future looked exceedingly doomed. A cancer survivor, yes, I admit, a tear filled my eye when I first beheld him back on the diamond...and back on the mound. It makes today's game all that much more intolerable to behold...as well as the mounting patterns I behold from not only Lester, but Lackey, and the Red Sox organization, as a whole.

Mark Teixeira was not the most recent victim of Lester's propensity to hit batters with pitches. Actually, he is in fairly good company. 35 other batters across the league can understand Teixeira's discomfort...some more than others, obvioulsy. This may be due to the fact that of the 20 rostered Red Sox pitchers, only 8 have not hit a batter with a pitch this year. Lester leads the Club with 9 hit-by-pitches in 13 games. John Lackey comes in 2nd place in the bean-ball effort with accomplishing 7 hit batters in 8 games. There are 10 other Red Sox pitchers who have hit at least 1 batter...well, actually somewhere between 1 and 5, each.

In this graph, you can see the dates of the games, the pitchers who hit batters, the hit batsmen, and their position within their clubs that day. I find it interesting how there have been 8 hit DH's...coincidence, perhaps. 5 hit Short Stops, 5 hit Centerfielders...etc. etc. But what I truly find intriguing is how in less than 11 innings from May 20th, 2011 through May 21st, 2011, Marlon Byrd was hit 3 times by 3 separate Boston Pitchers...who somehow managed to actually throw strikes and only had difficulty with THAT particular batter. . . until he finally ceased presenting himself to bat, due to his emergency injury requiring hospitalization.

I find it especially interesting how these hit by pitches have increased in activity, especially in the month of May. I smile in spite my frustration at this disgusting trend and unrelenting continuum from the hands of Red Sox pitchers to the opponents they face and ask you: If, "Once is interesting, twice is curious, and three times is a pattern," then what do you call 36 times out of 60?

Monday, June 06, 2011

New York Yankees @ Anaheim: High and Tight or Right and Wrong?

On the average, umpires are 90% accurate in calling balls and strikes. This means on the average, 30+ pitches are called incorrectly during Major League Baseball games. MLB Umpires have been found to consistently call a strike zone that is not defined by the MLB Rulebook.

Mike Estabrook was the Home Plate umpire for tonight's game, the New York Yankees at Anaheim. The rookie Ivan Nova versus the accomplished ace veteran starter, Jered Weaver.

As some may not know, MLB actually "grade," their umpires. Mike Estabrook's stats as Home Plate umpire are interesting, to say the least. Of his officiating at Home Plate, 75% of the time he will call a "strike," where the ball is clearly above the strike zone. Conversely; Only 25% of pitches located below the strike zone will be called "strikes."

In just 4 games Estabrook has officiated as Home Plate umpire in 2011, he has observed an average of 9.5 runs per game, while only issuing 5.5 walks. However, his "SOPG," or "strike outs per game," is one of the highest in the league at an average: 15.5.

Ivan Nova, encountered this challenge of Estabrook's 75% bias of "shoulder high pitches must be thrown in order to have them called for strikes," in the 1st inning. Achieving one out, Aybar singled off of a fastball thrown by the rookie. Nova then logged a "wild pitch," with Abreu at-bat, advancing Aybar to 2nd. Unfortunately, Abreu doubled off Nova after 5 pitches, sending Aybar home. Then we encounter a "passed ball," by Russell Martin, advancing Abreu to 3rd. Well, what the hell?? Now's a good time to walk someone, eh? Why not Torii Hunter? With only 1 out, perhaps we can force the double play. And that's about when Homeplate Umpire Estabrook began to get creative with the strike zone. With 2 pitches, the damage was done...

Skip ahead to the 4th inning. Branyan singles on a curveball straight over the plate, Trumbo also had his eye on that curveball that he finally received on the 5th pitch, landing both Branyan on 2nd and Trumbo on 1st. Nova then chose to stick with all fastballs with Mathis' at-bat, but no matter where he threw them, it seems Estabrook believed bases should be loaded...

Borjous came up to bat, he singled, Branyan scored, and I believe the trainwreck could have been far worse had batters like Izturis not struck out, popped out, or flied out. Because of Ivan Nova's 2 whole strike outs, I don't believe 1 of them were a Called Third Strike. Damn it, huh, Estabrook?

Weaver, on the other hand, did a fabulous job at pitching above the belt and logged 8Strike Outs, in addition to the bullpen's 3. I have no idea how many were "Called Strike Outs," but then again, I don't give a shit. Just take a look at Weavers pitching pfx for the game. The green dots are deemed BALLS and the red are CALLED STRIKES or deemed strikes via fouls or swinging strikes.


Poor officiating has ruined many otherwise amazing opportunities in Major League Baseball games. Rarely are these "mistakes," ever mentioned, however. Just another loss. Just another win.

...Unless your name just so happens to be Jim Joyce or Armando Galarraga.

Thursday, April 21, 2011

Bud Selig: Money & Power...not necessarily in that order...

As the Commissioner of Baseball, Bud Selig became the first person to own a major league sports team while simultaneously holding ultimate authority over all aspects of the sport...

His father was a successful car dealer, and Selig's college roommate was Herb Kohl, who went on to own a chain of department stores, a seat in the Senate, and the NBA's Milwaukee Bucks. After college, Selig went to work at his father's car dealership, and eventually became a millionaire.

In 1970, Selig bought the one-year-old Seattle Pilots baseball team out of bankruptcy for $10.8-million, and announced that the team would become the Milwaukee Brewers. Selig was hailed as a hero in his home town, for bringing big league baseball back to Wisconsin after the National League's Milwaukee Braves had left for Atlanta four years earlier. Over the next 23 years, Selig's Brewers finished in last place or next-to-last 12 times, and made the playoffs twice. Then, in 1992, baseball's owners decided that Commissioner Fay Vincent had been too sensitive to fans and players' perspectives, and not attentive enough to the owners' needs.

They pressured Vincent to resign, and Selig was named "Acting Commissioner" on 10 September 1992. To the casual baseball fan, the arrangement might sound peculiar. But if you're a baseball aficionado, you'll probably understand that it's worse than that. The Commissioner's Office was established in 1920, in the aftermath of scandal: eight players for the Chicago White Sox had been accused of taking bribes to intentionally lose the 1919 World Series. The game of baseball was condemned for being fixed, and baseball's owners understood that if fans questioned the game's integrity they'd buy fewer and fewer tickets.

So they invented the post of "Commissioner", and hired a famous and well-respected judge, Kenesaw Mountain Landis. Landis was given a lifetime contract, so he couldn't be fired, and his only responsibility was to take whatever actions he deemed to be in the best interest of baseball. One of Landis's first acts was to ban the eight "Black Sox" players.

As a car dealer who owned a baseball team, Selig's impartiality as Commissioner was often questioned, but not nearly enough. Putting an owner in charge of baseball's integrity was like asking a team's catcher -- instead of an umpire -- to call balls-and-strikes. Selig's daughter, Wendy Selig-Prieb, took over as "acting president" of the Brewers, and Selig's investment in the team was -- not immediately, but eventually -- placed in a trust.

During the 1994 season, players went on strike, and Selig took a hard line against them. On 14 September 1994, Selig announced that the remainder of the season would be cancelled. It was the first year without a World Series since 1904. In January 1995, Selig reassured fans that there would be a 1995 season, but "with the best players willing to play" -- meaning scabs. Spring training opened with minor league players in major league uniforms, but the fans' and media's reactions were so negative, Selig relented. The strike was settled before the season began, by acceding to almost all the players' demands. Canceling the 1994 World Series, then, accomplished nothing for baseball, except to discourage and alienate its fans.

In 1998, Selig was promoted from "acting" to "official" Commissioner of Baseball. By then it was common knowledge, visibly obvious to any observer, that several of baseball's biggest stars were bulking up with the use of steroids. With sluggers' new artificially-enhanced strength, home run records that had stood for decades were topped and topped again. Selig did nothing until, several years later, public trials and non-fiction books documented how the game had been juiced.

In 1999, Selig announced that he was negotiating to have corporate advertising sewn onto the sleeves of players' uniforms. Another uproar led to the scuttling of those plans, so far. Also in 1999, Selig finally vacated his office in the Brewers' ballpark -- not for ethical reasons, but because County Stadium was being torn down. It was replaced by one of those new faux old-fashioned stadiums with fewer seats and higher prices.



At the 1999 World Series, Selig was embarrassed when fans voted banned-for-life Pete Rose to baseball's "All-Century Team". The ceremony, at Atlanta's Turner Field, was the first time Rose had been allowed inside a major league ball park since his 1989 expulsion from the game, and he got the longest, loudest ovation of any of the all-time greats -- more applause than Ted Williams, or even Atlanta's beloved Hank Aaron, and much, much more than Selig. And immediately after the ceremony, before the game, Rose was required to leave.



In 2000, Selig had Major League Baseball take control of each team's websites. Shortly thereafter, baseball began requiring fees from fans who wanted to listen to radio play-by-play on-line. Pop-up ads were triggered on every page at mlb.com, so fans who cared enough to click ten pages of statistics got ten pop-up windows.

In October 2001, Selig announced that 25 of baseball's 30 teams had lost money that year, and the game was $4-billion in the red. When skeptics wanted to see the teams' books, the Commissioner would not allow it. Selig decided that baseball's financial problems were caused by having too many teams in smallish cities, and he announced that at least two teams would be eliminated by the start of the 2002 season. He wouldn't say which two, however, so fans of four struggling teams -- the Florida Marlins, Minnesota Twins, Montreal Expos, and Tampa Bay Devil Rays -- spent the off-season worrying. The press finally decided the Expos and Twins were on the chopping block. Twins fans sued, and as spring training loomed for the 2002 season, Selig announced that the Expos and Twins could continue playing baseball after all, as his "contraction" plans would be delayed at least another year. There's been no public announcements of contraction since.

On 9 July 2002, baseball played its annual All-Star Game in Milwaukee. The score was 7-7 in the 11th inning when the teams ran out of pitchers, and Selig announced the game would end as a tie. 40,000+ fans at the stadium booed, chanted "refund, refund", and started throwing trash onto the field. Millions watching on television must have given Selig the finger. "This is not the way I wanted [the game] to end," said Selig. "I was in a no-win situation," he added.

In 2002, Montreal Expos owner Jeffrey Loria wanted to dump that team and buy the Florida Marlins instead, an unprecedented switch. But after thirty-plus years of consistent losing, Loria's Expos had alienated almost all of Quebec and Canada, suffering dismal attendance, meaning Loria had no prospective buyers. Their games weren't even being broadcast on local TV or radio. So Selig had baseball itself -- a consortium of all the other owners -- buy the Expos. For several years, the Expos played many of their "home games" in San Juan, Puerto Rico. When they played in Montreal, the stadium was always close to empty, as Selig had made it clear it was just a matter of time until the team left Quebec. The Expos now play in Washington, DC.

Loria, meanwhile, was immediately allowed to buy the Marlins. His ex-partners in owning the Expos have sued Major League Baseball under the U.S. Racketeer Influenced and Corrupt Organizations (RICO) Act.

In 2003, Selig announced that the league that won each year's All-Star Game would have home-field advantage in that year's World Series. Traditionalists were aghast. For a century, the home-field advantage for the championship had rotated each year, a seemingly fair system. But now, one of the most important factors in baseball's showcase event -- where the games are played -- may be decided when the second-baseman from a last place team hits a bad-hop grounder at the All-Star Game, months before.

In 2004, Selig announced that the logo for Spiderman 2 would be embroidered onto to tops of first base, second base, and third base in major league parks, as a promotional tie-in for that movie's release. Fans were again infuriated, and the New York Yankees refused to go along with the plan. Eventually Selig relented. Also in 2004, 12 years after becoming Commissioner, Selig sold his interest (local fans would say "disinterest") in the Milwaukee Brewers.

In smaller cities with baseball teams, Selig has repeatedly issued veiled threats to get state and local governments to underwrite new stadiums. "We love having Major League Baseball in [insert name of city], but the game just won't be viable here unless the team gets a new stadium." Unlike other private companies, most major league teams now conduct their business in buildings constructed and maintained by tax dollars.

Under Selig's watch, baseball has also added a few wrinkles that have proven popular with fans. The playoffs now include "wild card" teams, meaning it's no longer a prerequisite that teams have to finish in First Place. And they've added interleague play, where National and American League teams face each other during the regular season.

When he is interviewed by reporters, Selig really, really tries to be seen as a big softie with a sentimental love of baseball. Maybe he is, maybe he does. Selig says he cried when the Milwaukee Braves left for Atlanta in 1966. He cried, he says, at the end of Kevin Costner's last baseball movie, For the Love of the Game. Selig also says he vividly remembers going to a ball game at Yankee Stadium in 1949. It was his birthday present from his mom, and he remembers where he sat. "Up there," he says, pointing toward the right field upper-deck seats. "The Cleveland Indians played the Yankees. I think Bobby Avila may have hit a couple home runs." Memory is a tricky thing, but 1949 was Avila's rookie year. He played in only 31 games, and he hit no home runs.

As the game's Commissioner, Selig has done more damage to baseball than Pete Rose ever did. And those who still care about baseball can only wait and wonder what Selig will come up with next.

(thanks to NNDB.com)

Friday, February 04, 2011

a little facebooking with an avid phillies fan. enjoy.

been pretty silent on your side of the fence. what? someone douse victorino with another beer, er what?? oh. lidge blow another save? mybad. shoot me some shit soon or i hex your team. amen.

‎9 days til p's and c's....4 aces...beat that hand

‎55. this is the number that makes the sun glimmer, the birds sing, and the waterfalls...fall? yeah. time for a smoke and way the shit more caffeine.

oh btw. your boy cliff is a sassy little bitch. mybad.

he actually complimented your squad yesterday....on their PAST accomplishments

so what. he's a tool. victorino has more integrity in his little finger than...wait. am i talking about shane victorino's body parts before noon again? wtf?!

AND ANOTHER THING. CLIFF LEE SHOULD BE COMPLIMENTING MY TEAM. HOW MANY GODDAMNED RINGS DOES THAT SKANK HAVE, ANYHOW? (yeah. red bull number one is kickin in.)

EVEN SHANE VICTORINO HAS A WORLD SERIES RING. i mean, come on

maybe he wasn't complimenting...maybe it was sympathy (Sympathy for the Devil

please. mister "my back. my poor back. i can't get any of my post-season teams to a world series championship cause i'm an elitist primadonna bitch?" yeah. meanwhile he SYMPATHIZES over my boys who are on like their 16th season of MOMENT BY MOMENT, DAY BY DAY, YEAR BY YEAR LABOR, STRUGGLE, DEFEAT, AND VICTORY? uh huh. sympathize that you'll never have 5 world championship rings, mr. lee. im sure this soothes mr. pettitte's deepest needs inside: the need for YOU to THINK OF HIM. sympathize that no ONE TEAM truly knows WHAT THE HELL to expect from you because you are NOT a team player...have sympathy for those who are CLEARLY uncut for your form of integrity, honor, committment, and GLORY.

elitest primadonna bitch...I looked it up in the dictionary and it said...Professional Baseball Player

you know i'm right. deep down inside you know this. and i respect that you will stand behind your team and it's members. but...hell, am i really going to say this? yes i am. I HAVE MORE RESPECT FOR THAT EVIL ROY HALLADAY than cliff ELITEST PRIMADONNA BITCH lee.

god. don't tell anyone i know that i just gave halladay props... :)

BUT! i like shane victorino more than halladay. and victorino is a dog. so, just balancing out the scales for your reference point beneath the point of zero

thanks....the balance is re-established in the universe

in parting, kind sir, i'd like to say something. i respect the phillies. there's no discounting this team. hell, i have to have SOME modicum of respect for pretty much ANYONE out there playing the very game that promotes the beating of my heart. from infinity to infinity, i have a baseline respect for every person attached to this game, because i love the game. but your phillies. i will FOREVER be in debt to them for that whole 2008 thing. lordhavemercy, my chest tightens and i feel the unquenchable forcings of a smile when i contemplate HOW your BADASS team confronted those smarmy fucking tampa stupidass bay losers...how tampa believed that their little "come from behind in the 7th and pull all kinds of shit and win with a walk-off," maneuver would work on your boys; which had been their little modus operandi all season. well, THAT, and their EFFERVESCENT BULLSHIT ENTITLEMENT PHENOMENON.

well, in the end. your boys arrived at the OK CORRAL with their guns loaded and their post-season poise, reason, moxie, and execution capabilities. they never flinched. they never relented. not even when LORD DARTH SELIG propogated a NEW MLB RULE of postponing the game RIGHT WHEN THE FUCKING RAYS TIED THE SCORE.

your boys were calm, cool, collected, and THEY had the "acumen of a seasoned pro." they were calculated, they conspired, and they excelled. when the veneer of "HEY, WE'RE JUST THE LITTLE TAMPA BAY RAYS YOU'RE PICKING ON," tactics of manipulative bullshit didn't work, and the "HEY, BUD PROMISED US WE'D WIN SO HE COULD GO INTO HISTORY WITH PROOF THERE IS PARITY IN MLB," didn't work...the masters of illusion and confusion and "taking it by force in the latter innings," got a little dose of their own godamned medicine.

by my boy Mr. U. with that fake throw to first that actually gave jason asshole bartlett the green light to run home: where the ball was waiting in the glove of carlos ruiz. it was one of the greatest moments i will ever spend loving your team. and one of the longest moments.

so...55 days, baby. thanks for the shit i requested. i shant hex your team. i haven't alot of high-aspirations for my team this season, but i do eagerly await the beauty, joy, frustration, and elation i will find on those diamonds. yours, mine, and ours. best of luck to your men.

and this is why I love the game....I can smell the grass on the infield right now...

Wednesday, October 20, 2010


a friend of mine was talking the other day about his Dodgers...and his concerns for next season. having only encountered this guy right after once again enduring YET ANOTHER game of ALCS failure...another collapse...another episode of hopes dashed against the jagged rocks of despair...i found myself unable to do much other than listen.

(rather...i occupied space nearby while he spoke.)

i theorize i was seemingly stunned. speculating. wondering...

since last weekend, i've subjected myself to 35 consecutive innings of loss. (yeah, there was that 1 inning of something close to my team actually playing well)...but aside from that: 35 innings of total shit. 35 innings of ARE YOU KIDDING? 35 innings of "playing chicken." and yet, somewhere around the 29th inning of epic failure...i realized we may not be playing chicken. we may not be playing anything. including baseball.

my friend hesitated for a moment in his incessant Dodger bitchfest over the divorce and judge and "what if (this)," and "what if (that)," just long enough for me to interject.

DUDE. HAVE YOU BEEN FOLLOWING MY STUPIDASS TEAM AT ALL?

he waved his hand in dismissal and said, "Dude. Jesus. Be glad your team made it."

as i walked away a short time later, i found myself literally speaking to myself aloud. "Be GLAD? Be glad we MADE IT? Why the hell would ANYONE want to deal with shit like this? Isn't it better to simply never make it to the post-season?"

and i mused on these thoughts.

ive mused for plenty of days recently. and not-so-recently. ive mused all season, and even prior to the season. the off-season...

is this normal? do normal people immerse themselves so much into something as remote and obscure as the game of baseball? do they continually check on the status and welfare of teams and players and prospects and...do they read history and spend hours on end in the winter watching documentaries on the remote and obsure game of baseball??

well, i don't care what normal people do.

not one damned bit.

this is how i'm wired. this is what i trip on. and that's that.

but i do sometimes envy normal people. like the cashier at the chevron, or my coworker, or even my Dodger friend (well, actually, no, i don't envy him)...but...somewhere on the planet are people completely oblivious to what today means. people who are seeing today as just some idle wednesday...lookin forward to this weekend and halloween and all that.

good for normal people.

they say freedom's just another word for nothing left to lose.

i wonder if i presently embody that definition with regard to my yankees...

cause, somewhere aroung the 28th, 29th consecutive inning of SHIT yesterday a thought occurred to me: it's over. tomorrow is our last game, or next to the last game. we will not advance and it's time to let this year's team rest.

let it be.

i don't generally give up on any challenge...but i generally weigh possibilities and principles behind that to which i invest myself.

my investment now is open to freedom.

not gripping tightly to an impossible feat against all odds...cause, well, sometimes we get so caught up in the struggle that we forget why we started the fight. it is reasonable to contend...for the yankees to try...to make every effort to play to the best of their ability and so on and so forth and blah blah blah

but dude. all godamned season long we have had a rocky and inconsistent team. all godamned season long i have held breath after breath after breath only to have NO GODAMNED CLUE what we were doing or HOW we were doing it.

yeah...the record showed we were tops. we held the east and all that. but...how the HELL were we the BEST? cause, we were often: SHIT. and if WE were shit, AND the best...then youre telling me the rest of the league is WORSE THAN US?

THAT was hard to comprehend.

which brings us to san francisco and texas and the phillies and us.

and...i guess on paper and within the realm of the Championship Series and Division Title winners and wildcard and all that other crap: we're the final 4 best teams.

hardly.

as i say farewell to this 2010 season with an exhausted and grateful heart, i am reminded that every season ends...and every ending season is hard to face.

but what i really miss, already, is seeing my team play well.

Thursday, September 16, 2010

magic math...and the 2010 post-season forecast...



stats. dig it. based upon my calculations:
the greatest threat for the yankees is tampa bay.
minnesota is not to be overlooked.
giants, atlanta: OUT.
rockies: IN.
whomever takes the alcs will face the phillies and beat them.

thus:
YANKEES v. TEXAS > YANKEES
TAMPA BAY v. MINNESOTA > TAMPA BAY >

YANKEES v. TAMPA BAY > ?

PHILLIES v. COLORADO > PHILLIES
CINCINNATI v. PADRES > CINCINNATI

PHILLIES v. CINCINNATI > PHILLIES

of course, we've eliminated the AARON BOONE, BUCKY DENT AND BILL BUCKNER factors...i'm jus sayin...

Tuesday, August 03, 2010

of A.J. Burnett, scope rifles, and compasses that point North...



I am at a complete loss with regard to A.J. Burnett's display of incredulous mayhem and uncontrolled devastation last night against the pathetically insipid Toronto Blue Jays...

This is to say, I WOULD hate him with the fire and passion of a thousand suns...but the time for that has come and gone. The depth of emotions welling up from my USUALLY WILLING TO FORGIVE AND FORGET, heart...has evolved into TODAY'S COMPLETE DISGUST AND WILLNGNESS TO ASPHYXIATE, heart. Hate is ineffective. Strangulation would suffice...

However, strangulation might require a step-ladder, 6 minutes alone with A.J., and, if successful, might eventually involve local and/or federal authorities. We have already clearly established, months ago, my predisposition toward authority figures. Me no likey.

Thus...back to the proverbial drawing board: There is a problem. There is no solution.

I don't care much for entertaining the concept of unsolvable problems.

...not where my best interest is concerned...

It is in my best interest not to be entwined with losers and defeat. It is in my best interest for my team to play well. I do not care much for losers and defeat. I would rather stab myself in the eye with a dull end of a half chewed pencil than sit patiently, while delusionally believing defeat is acceptable. It is not.

I consider such defeatest metalities to be rooted in defeatest hypotheses. Such hypoteses are repugnant, egregious, detestible, and just flat out annoyingly borderlining on flagrant Loserdom.

I would never rent an inch of space in Loserdom. I believe solutions exist to all problematic situations. I also believe some problematic situations indicate the need to run, don't walk...and to dust one's feet off from the Loserdom origin to which the problem initially existed. And after said running from said problematic situation, to gleefully kick one's heels in the air while realizing the liberation from said problematic situation...for...even escape can be seen as a profitable solution.

However, there is no escaping A.J....nor his portrayal as Home Run Derby Pitcher for the All-Star Toronto Blue Jays at Yankee Stadium last night.

This problematic situation is not one where escape and gleeful dust-flinging is possible.

The blood-letting to Canadia is over. I hope...

Yet, when a pitcher grants as many runs in ONE INNING as they gave up in the ENTIRE MONTH OF JULY, one must assume a problem is, indeed, at hand.

When a pitcher can sport a 1.99 ERA on May 4th, 2010 and a mere MONTH LATER (June 4th, 2010) enter into a downward spiril of losing EACH AND EVERY GAME (6/4; 6/10; 6/16; 6/21; 6/26; 7/2) one might seriously consider thinking about making a decision as to whether a problem is or is not at hand.

Said problem is at hand. Said problem is one which must be addressed. Said addressing of said problem should be swift and precise. Perhaps mercilessly addressed. I believe this seemingly inconsistent, yet, continual problem of defeat at the hands of A.J. Burnett must be met squarely in the middle of the forehead with the precision of a laser from a scope rifle... equipped with automatic bullet drop compensation, AccuPoint telescopic sights, and Kill Flash filters.

For...the problem with A.J. Burnett may be such that any reasonable and valid solution may seem too evasive or elusive...

But I like to think of the possibility of problem-apprehension.

Like a bank robber, reckessly careening a stolen get-away vehicle down the Pacific Coast Highway while blasting Anthrax's "Metal Thrashing Mad," we must stop this problem by PIT Maneuver...grab the skanky little felon by 4-point restraints and inject us some halcyion on said problem and make the problem do as we say. No Mirandizing. No lawyers necessary. No Bail. Comply. Or else...

In 2007, the Yankees witnessed a similar situation involving a 5-time All Star, 7-time Gold Glove winning pitcher; Mike Mussina. During that season, many similarities we presently enounter with A.J. Burnett, we encountered with Moose. Consistent inconsistency was what we, as fans, grew to expect, know, and endure. By August 27th of that year, Moose had allowed 32 runs in 3 starts and the Brass got upset. It was decided that Moose would be sent down, lose his slot in the rotation, and work through his mechanics. Or else.

The Yankees raised up a (then) unsmarmy and quite effective kid known as Ian Kennedy, (presently with the Arizona Diamondbacks, thank God.)

When Moose returned on September 12, 2007, (after 1 stint of relief pitching...the only time in his career he had ever thrown as a reliever) Moose was from thence forward: GOOD MOOSE.

In 2008 Mike Mussina went on to amass 20 wins in one season, having never accomplished that feat within his 18 seasons as a pitcher. We fans look upon those shaky weeks back in 07 with Kennedy slotted in place of Moose with ironic recollect...one of relief...one of disappointment...and ultimately one of gratitude. For even Moose, himself, admitted his need to address his own mental hurdles of personality, temperance, and his temendous need fora dose of humility. The very Drain-O required to empower, again, a phenominal pitcher who had seemingly imploded after 17 seasons...

Is this scenario plausible or even reasonable for our present-day A.J.? Is A.J. Burnett requiring some sending down to work on mechanics? And if we were to send A.J. down, is there a Kennedy to raise up?

A.J.'s velocity is consistent with his career numbers involving his fastballs and sinkers. Inasmuch as his strike out rates are down, his walks are consistent with his career numbers. If mechanics or injury were suspect, velocity would be effected. It isn't. He is still commanding his fastballs and sinkers...so what gives? He had a 1.99 ERA on May 4th, but presently has a 4.93. WHAT IS UP? Of his 5 starts in April, he lost 1; May outings yielded 4 wins of 6 games started...and then June he lost all 5 starts...July 2nd he went out 6.2 innings, allowed ZERO runs...and went on to win 4 more starts in July, allowing only 7 runs all month...so, yesterday he gives up 7 runs in the 5th inning...???

After his previous outing of July 17, 2010, where he was yanked off the mound after just 2 innings...he went on to explain to the media that he had cut his hands pretending to be Kevin Brown with the clubhouse doors in between the 1st and 2nd inning. This was after lying to his team and manager about cutting himself shaving. Uhm: Red Flag?

Oddly, I haven't heard any excuses for last night's fireworks blasting off the icky bats of 11.5 games behind us: Toronto...

Bottom line is: Last night's shelling of 7 runs in 1 inning...and A.J.'s 6 consecutive losses of June are, indeed, of serious concern. If A.J. performs this way in September and simply hands us a month of losses, what will become of the season? Is there a solution? Is there a problem?

The only possible "Kennedy's," at triple-A Scranton have been on the chopping block for trade fodder. Ivan Nova and Zach McAllister were main candidates for the Danny Haren acquisition. The Brass has been willing to use Nova, but tonight we are handing the game over to Dustin Moseley and his 3.24 ERA. Why would we skim past using Nova or McAllister who clearly have more innings and better ERA's? Because we don't want them to go all Tyler Clippard on us and become worthless to any team looking for major league level pitching, that's why.

So now what? Trust A.J.? Audition kids? Don't forget, we are limiting Phil's hughes innings. Will Sabathia and Vasquez be able to hold the whole house of cards together?

And...I theorize...this is where the hate-of-a-thousand-suns comes in. A.J. Burnett and his $84-million arm had better get a compass and figure out which way is North. If Tampa Bay can amass consistent performances by 5 children earning a total of $9.1-million dollars and match our season of wins and losses...then shame on us for once again assuming more is better.

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Forks in the Road and Lightning of Today




As the electrifying buzz of the alarm clock jolted me awake, I stammered across the room to turn it off. The morning air seized every fibre of my being with a thousand frozen prickles...and as I gasped, a rush of fear flooded my barely conscious mind...


Stumbling to the kitchen, while cranking up the heater, I grabbed my Yankee mug and began to make my coffee. The pitch black sky outside, ominously watching me through the kitchen window...the corners of the windows, frosty...leaves swirling with the windy rain, smashing against the frozen glass...my heart began to sink...


I'll never forget that idle Wednesday morning, with it's sadness and anxiety...with it's regrets and fears. That was to be a Wednesday of arrival...a Wednesday of relief...a maiden voyage of victorious relaxation and resolution...

It was supposed to be over...fears, frustration, worry, regret...it was to be a thing of the past by Sunday. Done and done. And yet...here it was...still brewing...still breathing...still defying...ominously mocking...

I opened the front door and was immediately ht by an invisible, frozen wrecking ball of wind. A forceful blast of ice mixed with splinters of rain seized my presence...confronting me...overwhelming me...a force greater than me, insisting I relent...I dropped my head as I entered the world that day...

As I walked to work, maneuvering the umbrella this way and that...amidst the broken branches along the sidewalk...amidst the puddles...I prayed. With sadness and heaviness of heart, I asked God to simply help me...help me with how I was feeling. This was simply a game. Baseball. We are either going to go out there tonight and win, or we will lose. The odds were extremely in our favor...and had been...and I really needed to get a grasp on my emotions...click back into reality...

No team, in the history of baseball had ever come back from a 3-0 deficit and won the remaining 4 games, however, was my next thought. Even in prayer, I couldn't stop my thoughts...the very merry-go-round of thoughts that had been incessant for 4 days...and 4 long nights...


Maybe the Yankees were trying to make the series interesting...maybe it was a tickets/revenue thing...maybe they just weren't taking it all very seriously, having already won the first 3 games...knowing the only goal ahead was to win one more...

But the moment for sobriety was today. My team had sat back and squandered their enormous advantage through three more games...landing themselves in a one-game win or go home scenario...and tonight....tonight...was the verdict.

What if? Is it even possible? Could we lose? Why would we? Exhaling...exhausting my worries in my prayers...I threw out a compromise to God...give me a sign...just a glimmer...the first song I hear on my mp3 player will be that sign...okay?

And God answered.

"Another turning point, a fork stuck in the road
Time grabs you by the wrist, directs you where to go
So make the best of this test, and don't ask why
It's not a question, but a lesson learned in time

It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right.
I hope you had the time of your life."


And I knew. The message was delivered. The answer was unquestionable. We were going to lose tonight. We were going to lose in the biggest way possible. History would be made and we would have allowed it.

When the night sky returned to black that night and I was walking home from work...amidst the broken branches, puddles, and wind...I listened to that song again...I knew I would walk through the front door and the television would be on...I knew it would be about the 7th inning, or later...and I knew there might be a chance my understanding of the postcard message from Heaven might be wrong...

It wasn't.

The Yankees went on to lose the 2004 ALCS game 7...the first team in baseball history to lose 4 games in a row after having won the first 3. The Boston Red Sox would continue on in their quest to reach heights they had only ever dreamt...and would become Champions of Baseball for the first time in 86 years...

There was something about that particular loss that knit itself to my heart and soul. One of the most permeating, marrow wrenching, soul drenching defeats I have ever encountered in my life. I mean, Jesus...it is only baseball. It is only a game...

How is it a sports event can entwine itself into the deepest aspects of the heart and soul? I pondered that idea for a long time...many years...even to this day...and my answer is...I don't know.


Nobody likes to lose.


Loss...loss is pain. Whether it be your English Springer Spaniel who had to be put to sleep when you were at school...or your best friend who had to leave you to attend college back east, on a hot summer day, when you couldn't have imagined pain so deep could exist in your 15 years on the planet...

For me...baseball transcends the field...transcends time and space...the victory and defeat on mere grass with mortal players throughout all time has taken on a fourth dimension in my heart and mind...

A spiritual dimension. A passion I cannot convey. I guess my life experiences just seem to coalesce with what I behold when I watch. Bravery, envy, injustice, tenacity...it's all there. The very aspects of this experience known as life...if you listen very closely...open your eyes and absorb this game...it lives. It breathes. It teaches...and those lessons become specific unto you, the beholder...if you listen with your ears closed and see with your soul open...

From 2004 unto this present day, I have had many thoughts back to that black Wednesday morning...and the following days thereafter...the tears...loss...denial...frustration...knowing without a doubt that losing is absolutely possible at any point in time...grasping the reality that stats really, in the end, don't amount to much...

Smiling and shaking my head at teams like Boston...who were able to toe up to the line of failure and challenge it...who were brave enough to believe...and believed so pure-heatedly that their actions would duplicate that belief...who were not moved by odds...who were unwilling to lose...

The jealousy I developed for that spirit in a team...that moxy...that boldness without reason...realizing the complacency and apathy that resided in my own team...

Through the years I have smiled as I have seen that lightning flash of excellence from all over the league...from watching archived games...and I realize, this, too...transcends time and space...

Today...the New York Yankees hold the best record in baseball...and the season holds roughly 40 games remaining...the Red Sox are struggling to salvage a post-season opportunity...the Texas Rangers are knocking on unfamiliar doors...and bats are swingin...strikes are smokin...plays are being made with the bravest and purest of efforts...

Today, I look across the league...this season that is 2009...and I wonder...after so many years of failing and falling and complacency and apathy...what will become of this 2009 Yankee team...

and...the answer comes to me from long ago. The season will end...someone will win...everyone else will lose...and we will roll around to another season...once again...and again...and...

Winning and losing can, indeed, seem like everything...but...in the end...there is no ultimate win...there are silent, 4th inning with 1 out moments of victory...moments of awesome effort from teams like the Pittsburgh Pirates, the Oakland A's, the Kansas City Royals...perfect games, no hitters, hitting the cycle's...

2009 Has been one of the best seasons for baseball since as far back as I can remember...and...whether it goes up or down for our teams, let's remember as this season comes to an end:

It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right.
I hope you had the time of your life.